Why Generic Friendship Principles Don't Work

You've been told the principles:
Be kind. Be generous. Love more. Give more.

And these are good principles. When everyone operates by them in healthy, coherent ways, relationships thrive.

But here's the problem: These principles are blunt tools.

They don't account for nuances. They don't tell you where the line is.

  • Love can become overprotective control

  • Loyalty can demand you cut off healthy friendships

  • Generosity can enable entitled behaviour

  • Kindness can mean tolerating mistreatment

Where's the line between healthy love and unhealthy dependence? Between appropriate loyalty and isolation? Between generous giving and being exploited?

The principles don't say.

If you grew up in healthy environments...

You might be fortunate. Things just worked. The principles seemed sufficient because everyone around you happened to apply them in balanced, respectful ways.

But what happens when they don't?

When the same principles fail you...

You're left wondering: "Why do these principles work for others but not for me?"

You start thinking something is wrong with you. You try harder—being kinder, giving more, loving better. And yet your relationships still feel off, draining, or one-sided.

It's not that you're doing it wrong.
It's that you need more precise tools.

This is where Social Health GPS comes in

It helps you look at relationships as they actually are, not as they're professed to be.

Someone can say "I care about you" whilst consistently:

  • Prioritising their needs over yours

  • Taking your time and energy without reciprocating

  • Minimising your feelings when you raise concerns

  • Expecting deference they haven't earned

Social Health GPS gives you an objective framework to:

  • See patterns clearly, regardless of what people claim

  • Quantify what "balanced giving" actually looks like

  • Identify where expectations are mismatched

  • Know when someone's words don't match their actions

You move beyond vague principles to practical clarity.

You stop asking "Am I being kind enough?" and start asking "Is this connection actually mutual?"

You stop wondering "Should I give more?" and start asking "Does my level of giving match where this friendship actually is?"

That's the difference between operating on feelings and operating with a framework.

If you wonder where to draw the line…

I invite you to try out my free resources. Experience the clarity for yourself and cultivate uplifting tribe friendships!

Start my journey